The Path of Healing

I left my last post here two months ago with a rather determined yet depressed note. I hate to leave my life in the hands of my readers in that state.  Its silly.  I’m not a depressed person, nor am I always sad or cynical or even methodical.

I’ve had two questions being posed to me lately.  The first is the one I mentioned in the previous post.  The simple task of, “When you climb a rope, what do you find?”  I did manage to climb the rope.  Well, I kept climbing and climbing and I’d get to the top and there would be a ceiling or another corridor or anything but “something.”  But eventually, I found a dream where I had a rope.  Vine, actually.  So I asked the vine that was on the…banyon esque… tree to toss me up to the top, which it did.  There was a moment of blackness as I fought to keep my lucidity, and I landed in my backyard.  There, in my own backyard, I saw a friend who I had been ignoring as of late, and I apologized to him and the dream faded out into a mess of normal stuff.

Spoke to my high priest, and now I have the next part of the task: get back up there, and find a fruit.  Observe the fruit.  So that’s where I’m stuc now.

Second task?  Find a direction!  Find a calling!  Tell me what you want to do with your life!  You can’t just arbitrarily choose – you have to know!

Those are the things he said, and those pissed me off too!  But in any case, I devoted some time and meditation to it – if only out of respect for him – and while I was also searching for graduate school ideas, I came upon the realization that I am, by trade, a healer and a finder.  It’s not a specific thing…like Tarot or a funky thing with knowing what dogs are saying, but its something.

So that’s where I am.  Discovering more about my path, and trying to find that damn fruit.

Anyway, I wanted to write a bit because I made a realization a bit earlier today.  My boyfriend hadn’t spoken to me since Friday.  I was annoyed, upset, frustrated, worried, pissy, etc – he’s a police officer, so not talking to me could mean he’s hurt or just dumb.

I got back here from home (I’m back to college now) and I was still annoyed and stressing and I decided to meditate / sleep.  And for three hours, I dreamed intensely about my boyfriend.  The dreams didn’t make any sort of sense, but they all had a theme:  him.  I was focusing my entire being, so to speak, on getting him to notice me, pay attention, and come back to me.  Because I don’t like it when he leaves.

I woke up three hours later and called him four times.  On the fourth try, I woke him up.

I didn’t realize that my stress dreams were really magic…but it’s what I inherently do when I need him or miss him.  And for the most part, it works.

New kinda magic!  Dream magic 😉